empty chambers of my broken heart.

I know what I felt, I was in love. It felt like a beautiful dream, then it turned into a nightmare. It was a month of constant complete closeness, I felt a future growing between you and I. Turns out, I was wrong. On your accord, it all came to a stand still. I said […]

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ode to a borderline.

I want to write. I’ve got so much on my mind. But also, my emotions are so intense that it’s hard to articulate these thoughts. The days and nights have been a blur. Don’t really know what I’m doing anymore. I feel lost and broken. Time has slowed down, like those early mornings back home […]

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one day we won’t feel this pain anymore.

But you have to hold on.You have to have patience. I have to say this.I might explode.This isn’t mega Amy speaking.This is me, speaking from deep within my heart.These thoughts and feelings are flooding out of me.They need to spill out.So here we go.I’ll say it here. I want to scream it from the rooftops, […]

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shadows of you.

I love writing. I hate writing.I love life. I hate life.I love myself. I hate myself.I love you. I hate you. One thing is for sure, I hate this month. Last week was the one year anniversary of when I lost my mom. Since she died last year, this will be a year of seconds […]

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bittersweet stasis

I’ve started reading a book called “The Midnight Library” by my favorite author, Matt Haig. It’s about a 35 year old woman who decides to kill herself because nothing in her life is going right, and she feels she isn’t needed by anyone. But before she actually dies, she’s in between life and death- in […]

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I will (always) let you down.

I don’t sleep much anymore. I’ve never been the best sleeper though. But lately, for months now, I stay awake until anywhere between 3am-7am. I can’t make my mind slow down. There’s always thoughts flowing in and out, swirling around and suffocating me. It’s nearly 5:30am, and I’m writing this post and crying too. My […]

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the glass box.

I shouldn’t be awake right now. I should be sleeping… but I’m haunted again by one of my worst memories. My eyes try to release it as much as they can. My tears understand. My pillow is damp. I’m frozen. I can’t sleep. I won’t sleep until I let this out. I wanted to leave […]

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el sol saldrá de nuevo.

I’m so cold. I’m losing my soul. Where did you go? I’m staring up into the sky. Asking myself why. Is this really goodbye?   The building we built. The tower we scaled. I couldn’t have imagined it. It was a thing of beauty. You were right before my eyes. An image of true love […]

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how did you know to get out of a world gone mad?

Where did you go?   I can’t stop crying. I opened this post up to try and release something that’s stuck inside of me- like using a spatula and trying to scrape dried gum off of a table. I’m sitting here, my t-shirt and lap full of my own tears. I have nothing but white […]

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