The Void.

I look at you. I look down. I look at myself. I look away. I try to meet your eyes, but the path into your iris is dead. I think I killed it on my end before we locked our visions together. The road is lost. I laid it to rest because why try when […]

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I’m Never Gonna Be Your Sweet Surrender.

I’m tired. I’m in so many levels of pain. I long to go somewhere else other than the security of my room. But it’s all I have, there isn’t a second home. No other place to rest my head when I’ve had enough of my own solitude. No other place I can go retreat to […]

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Alone… And Lost In Paradise.

Los Angeles. The land where dreams come true… well, supposedly. I haven’t been graced with the luck of accomplished dreams. Mostly me not having the energy or level of care and determination to chase after those dreams. That’s all they are: sweet dreams that swirl around in my infinite universe of a conscious. I wish […]

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You’re Uninvited.

Today has been heavy. I fell asleep with a heavy ache in my soul. I laid down, drifted away into another place that wasn’t my room. I don’t remember if I even brushed my teeth, which is rare because I’m all about oral care around the clock. I woke up feeling tired and empty. Why […]

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Lay Down The Law

Sometimes I have small revelations now and then. Things that stick, thoughts and ideas that surround my conscious and give me something to believe in. Today I’ve opened a door to a revelation that many people choose to shut and look for another door. Never compromise what’s truly in your heart. Don’t change your morals […]

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I Can’t Change Who I Am…

Reflecting on my life, I see a pattern when it comes to people. People I like, people I love, people I’ve tried too hard for… it feels like I try more for them. I try to make them like me and want to be friends/lovers with me. I’m seeking validation in possibly the wrong people. […]

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Blood On My Hands.

My hands seem to be unclean, no matter how hard I try to scrub the blood off. It’s more like cement, fused into my skin even though it should be inside of me instead. There’s a lingering guilt that plagues me, even when I try to look away and not notice it… It’s always there. […]

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I’m A Call Without An Answer…

I’m a shadow in the dark, trying to put it back together, as I watch it fall apart. Nothing Makes Sense Anymore – Mike Shinoda / Post Traumatic I stood in the pitch black darkness. I was staring into the pacific ocean, on the Salt Creek beach in Dana Point, where I (mostly) grew up. […]

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Talking To My Shadows.

Empty. Empty. Empty. Empty. Empty. Do you see me? Can you hear me? I’m looking into the dark and I thought I saw you there. I swear I did. I heard a familiar voice. It went away. You were there, too. But you went away. I can’t think of you or talk about you without […]

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Master Of The Mystic (Dark and Unstable) Arts.

I had a strange upbringing. Stability wasn’t a theme in my life––figuratively and literally. Most people I’ve encountered have only moved once or twice, others haven’t moved at all, and have stayed at their childhood home and never left their hometown except for college. I didn’t have that luxury. I moved more times than I […]

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