Shame Still Circles Beneath Me.

Been having the worst writers block lately. I’m trying to force myself to write, but the shit that comes out hardly makes sense to me. I had a bit of a meltdown last night, alone in my room. I haven’t cried as hard as I did in a long time. It’s like everything I’ve been […]

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Run Away (Take It All Away)

In all of my moments, all of my fleeting moments… The emotions that flood over me, the ones that are black and white; the colors of my tears that change faster than you could take another breath; the agony of another thought that pushes me under my skin, the place where I want to get […]

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Fly, Eagles, Fly… Far away from here.

It’s hard to write this, but I have to. I’ve mentioned that this time of the year is hard because it’s football season, and my ex is a die-hard Philadelphia Eagles fan. I mean, I don’t blame him. That’s where he’s from. Gotta rep your team. I just caught a bit of tonight’s game, it […]

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Depression is…

Depression is me laying in bed all morning, all afternoon. It’s me aimlessly staring into my phone, swiping through apps, as if the answer to my life’s problems are going to reveal themselves. Depression is me looking for the will to try to make a change, to better my life, but unable to tap into […]

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Kintsugi.

My cup is neither full nor empty. The vessel itself is cracked, therefore nothing really stays inside. Since the accident, I’ve felt even more incomplete than normal. Nothing seems to just stay inside and warm me up. My thoughts are jumbled or blank. I have nothing much to say. Everything feels like a void. I […]

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Reflection, Progress, Dissociate, Repeat…

Looking back at 2017, it’s amazing (and scary) how fast time flies by. I mean, it’s already November. Sometimes it feels like I never left, and sometimes I get trapped in this place where I wonder if things have really changed. Then I look around and realize while my body is completely removed, my mind […]

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Existential crisis forever.

I was working today, and I work hard. I work in a coffee shop, but I don’t make the coffee. I’m the bar back, the “runner,” in other words, the bitch of the shop. While I’m running around, doing everything to fill in the gaps of the people behind the bar, there’s a voice screaming […]

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Mental illness is real.

This is the face of depression. The face that suffered silently. Someone who felt that it was all too much to handle anymore. Someone who saved me and thousands upon thousands of others… A golden soul who hurt so much that he took his life 3 months ago. This is Chester Bennington, the lead singer […]

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The First Post – Authenticity.

Yep, the first post. The post that always seems to be the hardest one to write. It’s a time to think of something fresh to offer the world… But realistically, it’s all been written over and over, again and again, right? What could I possible have to say that will catch anyones eye? This train […]

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