Can you hear me?
I love writing. I hate writing.I love life. I hate life.I love myself. I hate myself.I love you. I hate you. One thing is for sure, I hate this month. Last week was the one year anniversary of when I lost my mom. Since she died last year, this will be a year of seconds […]
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I haven’t written on my blog in months. I haven’t abandoned it. I just haven’t had the words to say, I haven’t had the energy to convey how I’ve been feeling about anything. However, I felt compelled to so today. I want to think that I’m this person who is capable of talking about her […]
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I’ve started reading a book called “The Midnight Library” by my favorite author, Matt Haig. It’s about a 35 year old woman who decides to kill herself because nothing in her life is going right, and she feels she isn’t needed by anyone. But before she actually dies, she’s in between life and death- in […]
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I don’t sleep much anymore. I’ve never been the best sleeper though. But lately, for months now, I stay awake until anywhere between 3am-7am. I can’t make my mind slow down. There’s always thoughts flowing in and out, swirling around and suffocating me. It’s nearly 5:30am, and I’m writing this post and crying too. My […]
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There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.
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It’s been 2 months since I’ve written a post. I’m sitting here trying to find the words to say, and it’s depleting my energy quickly. My head is cloudy, and my hands feel so heavy. I don’t want to type. I don’t know what to say. I have moments in the day where I feel […]
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Reality and dreams, nothing is ever as it seems. I don’t know what lies beyond the horizon. I’m closing my eyes, imagining all the possibilities. Calculating every choice and every decision I could make. It’s overwhelming… but I’m still breathing. I’m alive. When the dark clouds of misery wash over me, and I feel the […]
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I shouldn’t be awake right now. I should be sleeping… but I’m haunted again by one of my worst memories. My eyes try to release it as much as they can. My tears understand. My pillow is damp. I’m frozen. I can’t sleep. I won’t sleep until I let this out. I wanted to leave […]
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Conceal it, don’t feel it. Don’t let it show. Don’t let them know. These things I feel… they don’t matter. But I feel them anyway even though they mean nothing. Nobody really wants to know what lies beyond the surface of my skin. Perhaps I tell myself this to save everyone else from getting pulled […]
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I’m so cold. I’m losing my soul. Where did you go? I’m staring up into the sky. Asking myself why. Is this really goodbye? The building we built. The tower we scaled. I couldn’t have imagined it. It was a thing of beauty. You were right before my eyes. An image of true love […]
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