an ode to chester bennington.

hello. I know, I know, I know. it’s been awhile since you’ve heard from me. I’m still alive. I haven’t written in a good, long while. I haven’t felt like it. I haven’t been inspired. everything I’ve felt has just sort of been stuck and lodged inside of my brain. just sort of tangled up […]

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hide from you, all of you

I can’t think. I don’t want to do this. I don’t want to type. But I do, I so desperately want to type. I want to tell the world that doesn’t listen to what I have to say what has been happening in my life for the last 9 months. I want to scream into […]

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tough girl, I’m in pain.

I should be sleeping, but I’m writing this instead. My head is spinning with so many thoughts, it’s difficult to keep myself tethered to the present. Can I organize my thoughts? I don’t know. All I know is that I’m hurting because my own brain has flooded me and is drowning me in my insecurities […]

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a new year: a new way to bleed.

Happy new year, everyone. I truly hope 2022 isn’t as barren as the last few years have been. It’s hard to think otherwise, as my nihilistic tendencies have intensified so much. There have been countless times where I’ve wanted to write here. It’s been months. But I just haven’t had the words to say. It’s […]

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empty chambers of my broken heart.

I know what I felt, I was in love. It felt like a beautiful dream, then it turned into a nightmare. It was a month of constant complete closeness, I felt a future growing between you and I. Turns out, I was wrong. On your accord, it all came to a stand still. I said […]

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I am the ghost who floats through time.

I don’t know where to begin. I want to rage and smash things. I want to bash in my keyboard for the words that I’m about to lay down. But all I can do is cry, hold and try to soothe myself. I want to know where in life I went wrong for some people […]

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never mind me, I’m a waste of your time.

I hate feeling so much. I hate it. It’s exhausting. I don’t want to feel anymore. I’m tired of hurting. I’m tired of feeling such intense emotions, more than most anyone else feels. I’m not well right now. And I’m sure people who know me are just like, “meh… she’ll feel ok in a bit. […]

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3:15am

Life is so unpredictable. I don’t know why it surprises me, I mean… it shouldn’t. Existence is just so random. Being human is bizarre. Being human can be really great, but being human also hurts. Sometimes I wonder if it hurts more for others? Does it hurt more for people like me? I just can’t […]

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