Time Is Telling Me, “This Is Gonna Hurt.”

Isn’t it wild that it’s already November? The years go by so fast now as I get older. A strange phenomenon. Life seems to pass by slowly as a kid, because that’s just the beginning of your life. As we age, we have more of a past that we can reflect on, thus making it […]

Read More

Reality and Dreams; Not What It Seems

I’m staring into traffic. I’m not in a car, I’m in my head. I’m sitting in a patio with music playing in my earbuds. But I’m staring, I’m not blinking, just staring into the vehicles that whizz by. I wonder if the people that are in those cars are daydreaming too. I wonder if they’re […]

Read More

Certainly Uncertain, But I’m Alive.

I’ve felt this way many times before. You know, that swirling feeling of uncertainty… but you know that feeling. It’s an uncertain familiar feeling. I realized that’s an oxymoron, but bear with me. For most of my life, I’ve lived in this fear, this uncertainty that has made itself a place inside my mind. I’m so […]

Read More

Pirouetting Into My Prison.

There will never be enough blog entries to fully describe the indignation, anguish and hollowness that swirls inside of myself. I try over and over to drain it from my soul. I keep writing, hoping the next post will be the one that gets it all out in the open, far away from my cold heart. […]

Read More

Such A Waste; You’re Falling From Grace.

I didn’t know you long. I should’ve waited, should’ve given it more time before fusing my world with yours. Why was I impatient? I guess I was just so intrigued by you; I’d never known someone who was intertwined in their mind like I was. And yet, maybe we weren’t so alike after all. I […]

Read More

Always Find My Place in the Uncertainty.

My mind aches. My head spins. My heart hurts deeply. My soul is breaking. My spirit has flown far away from me; far from the mess that has presented itself in my waking life. My dreams reveal all the confusion I’m too apprehensive to face when I’m awake. Apprehension and fear have held me back, […]

Read More

Abysmal Heart Hymn.

It seems, it FEELS like everything isn’t real. Like the thoughts and emotions that course through my veins are fake. The thoughts I think are nothing but “lies.” I invalidate myself. I tell myself I shouldn’t be feeling this or that way, or that there isn’t a reason to feel or think whatever it is. […]

Read More

My Muse.

I’ve waited endlessly through time. I’ve waited patiently, impatiently, nearly giving up, then taking back all the hope and faith I had let go. I have crawled through the wreckage, through hordes of people that once captivated me, through heartbreak, through blood, sweat, and tears. I nearly drowned in the darkness that overtook me in […]

Read More

Higher.

There’s so much yet so little I want to say. Every day I evolve. All these thoughts and ideas that flow through my mind. Some abstract and complex, others are so simple and complacent. I always want to be better than I am from the previous day. But after awhile, the days start blending together […]

Read More

Believe Me, I’m Bulletproof.

“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” – Eleanor Roosevelt That is my mother’s favorite quote. She told me it often growing up. She’s not wrong. As each day passes, I feel myself get just a tiny bit stronger. It may not seem like much, like a millimeter everyday. But when you […]

Read More